Today, on our blog the real experience of a future maid of honor that shared with us her feelings about it! Together with her, we share with you some of the best Bridesmaids – Bride scenes from our real weddings!
She never asked me. My best friend, I mean. She never asked me to be her maid of honor. We just knew. We knew that when the Big Day came, we would be there, side by side. A silent pact between us. So, when she told me she was going to get married, I knew my most important moment as best friend had arrived. The happiness of the moment is immense, BUT, when everything calmed down, one simple, yet quite scary, question popped into my head: “What am I supposed to do now?”
What does a Maid of Honor do? – Bridesmaids Style
Being quite clueless on the matter (and, believe me, Hollywood and rom-coms do not help with any of this!), I turned to the only source everyone of us knows to be THE Answer. The magic well of solutions, the “Mirror Mirror on the wall” of problem-solving: Google. So much for problem-solving! This only led to problem n.1: too much information.
Dear readers, it’s a jungle out there! The results are endless! Vogue, Elle, Martha Stewart, everyone had something to say on the topic and, still, I hadn’t understood exactly what I had to do. “Be part of the entourage on the “dress day”, take care of the details, prepare a bridal emergency kit (make-up tissues, Band-Aids) , help the bride not to over stress and on and on.
To that, you have to add the other things you automatically think about: your dress, pretty but not as pretty as the bride; your gift to the couple, bigger and better than a general guest, but not over the top; the bachelorette party, fun and unique, but suitable for everyone; and who knows what else! That’s why, eventually, I decided to forget about all that and focus on the basics: sign the papers (here in Italy the witnesses, so they are called, have to do that as well) and be there for my best friend.
How can I be there when I can’t be there? – Bridesmaids Style
Problem n.2: my best friend lives 240 km/150 miles away from my home town. I missed the magical moment of “THE CHOICE”. She found her dress and I wasn’t there to hand her the box of Kleenex to dry her tears of joy with. I still haven’t seen it, for the record! I only saw it on a perfect picture of a photo shoot. And, frankly, it broke my heart. I really wanted to be there that day. I really wanted to share the memory of that moment. And as the days passed by, every detail was being settled and, again, I wasn’t there.
I felt useless, like I didn’t fulfill my role. Then, when I finally got the chance to spend a couple of days with her, I felt offsite. The little I knew, she had shared it with me over the phone or on WhatsApp. And that made me feel even more useless. But, it was when my best friend, Laura, told me that she was “so happy we got the chance to spend this time together” that I realized that “being there” doesn’t mean being consulted in every aspect of the day. It doesn’t mean going to every single appointment. Those are not my choices to make, are the bride and groom’s! “Being there” simply means to be available, to show interest, to ask about the preparations, to tell her that she can count on you, to be honest…
Being the Maid of Honor of your best friend makes your friendship grow stronger – Bridesmaids Style
This moment in her life is so important! And it is an honor that she wanted me to have a role in it and I will cherish this forever. So, the process isn’t over yet. The wedding is in August and there are still a lot of things to take care of. However, all I want to do is to enjoy this “adventure” with my best friend; I want to enjoy her moment. All I have to do is just be my usual best friend-self. I know for sure that that is going to be more than enough!
So, are you or were you in this situation as well? Are you going to be the Maid of Honor or a bridesmaid? Were you overwhelmed by doubts and questions just like me? Tell us about it in the comments below or ask Super Tuscan wedding Planners!